Member-only story

Give Us the Figgy Pudding . . . And Nobody Gets Hurt

Donald Unger
3 min readJan 17, 2019

[Our correspondent comes to you live, just before Christmas, from not-quite-Tahrir-Square; the revolution will not be televised . . . but we can listen in on the audio feed.]

Credit: Shutterstock.com

Sorry, Bob, the audio feed is a little choppy.

If I properly understood your last question: You are correct.

The crowd has stated that they will not disperse until their demands are met.

I — what is? Wait! — I, yes, they seem unequivocal.

Although they are representing themselves as “a group without leaders,” there does seem to be some unified animating logic behind what they are doing, although — I-have-to-say — what that logic might be is not entirely clear to me.

I — Bob, you’re breaking up . . . Hello?

Can you hear . . ?

Yes.

I think we have . . . Alright!

Pretty sure the satellite-feed is back up.

New York can you — Bob! — can you hear me clearly now?

Good.

Yes!

It does appear that the crux of the matter is, in fact, “Figgy Pudding,” and that it is unlikely that the government will be able to resolve this situation without said pudding.

--

--

Donald Unger
Donald Unger

Written by Donald Unger

I write what I know and what I’ve lived: humor & chronic pain; politics & parenting; business writing & cultural analysis; and . . . ranting (a lot of ranting).

No responses yet